Ideal Pouring of Mind

In the car on my way home today I was truly inspired. The weather was beautiful, the sun not too hot, and the wind warm to a perfect degree. I wished I had my laptop with me right then and there to record what I was feeling.

All of a sudden I wanted to e-mail a long-gone intimate, and I wanted to write some five articles all at once. I saw the articles forming in my mind’s eye, and I knew exactly what to say and how to say it.

I wanted to say things that had been bottled up way deep in my head that I never could really fathom them, but in a moment of clarity I knew precisely what they were and I was able to physically feel them. It was almost orgasmic.

The minute I arrived home, I found the place dark and cold. The sun outside was still warming the garden and the veranda, the cacti seemed to bathe in its warmth without a worry in the world. The house, in contrast, was frozen and still.

I had to remain inside for ten minutes to change and arrange my things. By the time I came out again, the heat from the sun was gone. My cold room absorbed that tranquil warmth and my limbs, due to my poor blood circulation, stiffened and turned cold.

When I rushed outside the sun had fainted. The warmth was no longer there and it was replaced by a slow, steady, cool wind. Everything basked in the shade and I kept searching for a patch of light to rest in, in the garden and in the veranda, to no avail.

I also lost my muse. She’s too illusive in the cold.